All posts in Self Awareness

3 Things to Transform Crisis in Opportunity

scorched-earthSometimes things have to fall apart. We are trained , for the most part however, to look at crisis as a negative thing – a time that is filled with pain, loss and much suffering. Yet I wonder if this sort of thinking is serving us. What would happen if we were to look at the ‘crisis’ we are faced with as an opportunity instead? Is it possible that sometimes things have to fall apart in order for us to rebuild a better model of life for ourselves? Continue Reading →

Staying In Love after Baby – 4 things all couples should practice

8550838313_988bb45500 There’s nothing quite like a new addition to the family to put stress on a couple’s relationship. While a baby brings with it so much joy and more often than not, increased connection between partners, it also adds multiple demands on the couple and can wear resources thin. Juggling the role of parent with the role of partner can sometimes be tricky, especially under conditions where you are sleep-deprived, emotionally-drained and can’t remember the last time you sat down and had 5 minutes just to yourself. In times as such , it’s easy to become more reactive and less patient with each other, more critical and less appreciative- which can not only increase conflict & tension but also start emptying that tank of compassion & good will which is essential to fueling your relationship. Continue Reading →

The Journey Home


We are all ultimately trying to come home to ourselves. The path however to getting there may not be always be easily traversed or well-lit. We will encounter many obstacles along the way ; challenges in our external experience and , inevitably, the darker deeper confrontations that happen on an internal level. In therapy, I try to provide my clients with a safe and nurturing space where they can address these life challenges, look at their inner struggles and then find the courage to take that next step. What I have found is always true- is that they are all journeying back to the same place-  a space of greater authentic connection with themselves , where the rocks are removed, the path is clear and they know they are home. Continue Reading →

A Teaspoon of Novelty can Change Your Life

85d36569a82bd21ca9cad843921d4756    ” When people are inspired , they have more brain real-estate” –  Says Julia Volkman of  BrainBasics in this excellent article on boosting your learning ability through harnessing the power of inspiration. Indeed, this and other recent research all seem to point what we’ve known intuitively for a long time now – when we like and are stimulated by something – we learn better. 

Lisa Wimberger , founder of The Institute of Neurosculpting, has taken our brain’s love of inspiration  & novelty to a new level. In her novel brain-training visualisations, she boosts the brains’ learning capacity through introducing interesting & novel tasks which involve right and left brain collaboration. Instead of a more typical ‘let’s talk about what you’re feeling’ approach, she mixes it up a little. Asking someone to name (left brain) an emotion , whilst paying attention to the sensation ( right brain) it may be creating in the body and any colour/texture/visual object it evokes ( novelty) is an example of this. The result? A stimulated brain, with neural pathways that are open and ready to learn. Continue Reading →

The Hardwiring Happiness Project


The Hardwiring Happiness Project

16 March, 2015
I started this project because ultimately I believe that it is your birthright to live a happy and fulfilled life – and that this is not some faraway dream but really something that, with the right tools, is right at your doorstep and you can experience every day. Continue Reading →

Staying with Intensity – Why Hot Yoga is My Therapy


It’s Friday morning and I’m probably 30 minutes into my 1 hour Hot Hour Bikram Yoga class, which in the 15 years that I’ve been practicing on a weekly basis could be the 3648 time I’ve done this – and yet as I feel the heat emanating off my mat, feeling into my warrior two pose, I find myself convinced the teacher has somehow made a mistake with the temperature dial in the room and all of us , engaged in the class are now faced with another 30 minutes of life-threateningly high heat. I look towards the door for my escape. Someone surely should say something before someone passes out? I look around the room and everyone just seems to be continuing , oblivious to the life or death scenario before us. My brain, on loop now, starts communicating one word quite perceptibly over and over again – “Run”. Continue Reading →

6 Minutes to a Stress-Free Life?


What if I told you you could get rid of stress and heal yourself in 6 minutes? While it may sound a little too good to be true, and I’m the last person to advocate quick-fixes in therapy, that’s what James Gordon is offering as an effective solution for stress-reduction in his latest interview for Psychotherapy Networker.  Gordon, who is the founder and director of the Center for Mind-Body Medicine,  is also a leading authority on mind-body approaches to treating depression and says that with this 6 minute “soft belly” breathing technique, you can experience immediate relief from stress. Continue Reading →

Why Inspiration Matters


In ” Why Inspiration Matters” ( Psychology Today, 2011) , Scott Kaufman discusses the power of inspiration as a real driving force towards helping us achieve the goals we want in life. Not only does it boost dopamine levels in the brain, which explain the increase in motivation and positive feelings ,  Kaufman says “Inspiration allows us to transcend our ordinary experiences and limitations and is a strong driver of the attainment of our goals, productivity, creativity, and well-being.”. This has huge implications for how we could be learning to approach not only our professional work, but also the jobs that we do at home and in other areas of our personal lives. Imagine being able to harness the power of Inspiration to propel you with positivity through a long day in the office – and towards goals that you previously felt were beyond your reach. Continue Reading →

The Gift of Someone’s Else’s Bad Behaviour

welcome_new_light-500x292‘Step 9 : Atonement With the Father – For if it is impossible to trust the terrifying father-face, then one’s faith must be centered elsewhere (in the Blessed Mother); and with that reliance for support, one endures the crisis—only to find, in the end, that the father and mother reflect each other, and are in essence the same.

Joseph Campbell, The Monomyth

I have to say at no other point in my life would this quote have ever made sense except in the circumstances that I have recently found myself in. Having just gone through a difficult separation with my partner, I was also then faced with a lot of rather unsavoury exchanges with him over the logistics of how we would move forward to take our lives apart as a couple, but still remain co-parents of our young daughter. The practicalities and tricky nuances of which are commonly experienced by separating couples who have children. Continue Reading →

One Small Thing

There is a lot to be said about small acts of kindness – or the simple things that we can do for others, whether it’s people we know or just someone who could benefit from our help, on any given day. This post takes a look at how this one small thing can have huge impact not only on the context and community around you, but also interestingly, positive benefits for your health and wellbeing as well. Continue Reading →